An Ode to Cheese.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE cheese. Always have and always will.  It is truly one of the most yummy things on this earth and gos oh so very well with red wine darling.  It is a life saver that on Dr. Cohen I get to have 60 g of cheese daily.  My choices are limited of course.  I mean I cannot cut up a Stincky Blue or a Fairview Brie, but I do get to have white hard cheese - the best choice is mozerella but I opt for Tussers, and of course I'm allowed low fat cottage/smooth cheese (tip:  add garlic or normal chives to spice it up at no extra calories)  So praise be to the makers of Tussers.  My lunch was that much more delicious because of the big T. 

Lunch:  70g mushrooms & 30g green beens sauteed ;) with garlic and salt.  Sprinkled with 30 g grated T.  I savoured every single bite.  I took my time and delighted in the way the cheese melted and was gooey - it felt and tasted so indulgent!  I then had "seconds" as I had 30g left over T and 2 crackers - bonus!  My lunch was without a doubt very delicious.  I think it's because my palate has become a lot cleaner so my taste buds are working well and truly tasting food.  Plus I don't rush.  So to the gods of cheese a huge thank you from this lil dieter.

Last night I went to stay with a mate of mine.  So it came to dinner time and after I had heated my meal, he looked at it and said with widening eyes "Is that all?"  Yes the servings are not large, but I am now eating to live and not living to eat.  My body gets what it requires and is satisfied.  During this process I am happy to report I have had no cravings.  Note:  different from desire.  So Kyle is preparing his food, and let me tell you it smelt heavenly even though it was baked oven chips and chicken schnitzel (salivate)  Then he cracked open a beer!!!!!  The smell of that beer made it's way into my nostrils and I truly wanted to take a huge gulp from the glass - wow - beer never smelt so good and I'm not a beer drinker.  Went to the fridge, got some ice and poured my vodka and sprite zero (minus the vodka).

This morning I had to attend an Amps meeting.  They always serve yummy scones, biscuits etc at these things, eyed the table when I walked in and made my way to the coffee counter and got myself a straight up black coffee with 1 sweetner.  Thank you very much.

So here I am at day 10 and stronger than ever.  Today my uncle heads out for chemo treatment no. 2 and tomorrow treatment no. 3. I will I am doing everything in my might to make sure that he sees a slimmer, healthier me.

Inspiration Abounds.

These days I wake up happier.  Whether or not the sun is shining, it's shining inside.  I know that the strength and will of uncovering the slimmer me lies within.  I've grabbed hold of that and my eyes are focused on the finish line.  I can feel a difference in my one white skirt (ja ja, fat people should never wear white...so they say, but this is a nice skirt)  Anyway, I'm wearing it today and it is DEFINITELY looser! whoop whoop *happy jig*  I have a feeling I'm going to be doing many a happy jig in the weeks and months to come.  I'm on the right track baby.

Now I ask myself "why did you not start sooner Lou?"  I mean really!!!  This could have been in the past and I could have been sporting that super bod already.  I wasn't ready for it.  I really didn't believe before that I could do it, which means I never believed in me.  Well that has totally changed. This time I am ready.  I do believe I can do it.  It is so fixed in my mind, body and soul.  NOTHING and I mean NOTHING will deter me.

I've signed up to receive the Dr. Cohen newsletter.  Here I will find new recipes, inspiration, encouragement to keep on at it.  I also checked out success stories and people the transformation of these biggest losers is phenominal.  Its jaw dropping.  So be prepared to see a very different Lou in a few months - on the outside that is.  I'm quite happy with who I am on the inside.  It's time the outside mirrored that.

So I am positive, strong and am pleased that 9 days have passed without a single cheat.  If I can do 9 days, I can do a 100 days and I'm looking forward to that challenge.

Weekend Update

Monday has arrived and I can proudly say in all honesty that I was 100% over the weekend.  No easy feat. 

As mentioned on friday it was my uncle Brians' birthday.  He requested a mild curry.  I took off half day to go do my shopping and get the curry on the go.  I made sure that I had eaten my lunch so that the gastric juices would be in control.  I have to say the chicken smelt absolutely delicious.  There was no way of telling how it tasted as I wasn't even going to have taste of the gravy, but it looked loooooooovely.  I made my dinner which was a very healthy mince curry and green beans.  I ate just before everyone got to my grans' place, so I was full. I dished up for everyone and was happy to see my family together sharing a meal. I felt in control and that was a winner for me.

Saturday morning rolled around and I started off with an egg and 65g onion/tomatoe and 2 cracker breads.  Prepared and packed my food for the day so that there would be no reason to cheat. I can't stress enough how important it is to be prepared - that is one of the keys to winning this battle.

Had my game of golf - which was shocking.  Literally threw the club a couple of times - I reckon it had to do with being empty and a little on edge :)  Later on visited some mates.  Again I made sure that I had my diet spirte and some soda water on hand, so that as they drank, I had my little "drinks" too.

We celebrated earth hour by turning off the lights and Graham got a delightful bonefire going.  There were times when I really felt like that glass of wine ( I do love me some red wine) but the thought popped into my head "how long does my uncle have?" That again gave me the strength to say NO NO NO.

Sunday cruised along lazily and I indulged in a sleep in - which meant I missed my breakfast.  Had an early lunch, then headed off to movies.  The smell of popcorn - oooooh my.  How could I go to movies and not have popcorn - it's not even that fattening....but it's not on my eating plan and therefore a no no.  I now know that I am going to be saying no a hellofa lot and that some people are going to start thinking I'm a little insane.  That's okay - it's my health and it's my choice.  It's what I want.  As expected I survived movies without popcorn :)

So that is my first weekend down.  The first of many.  So for those of you that want to lose weight, my word of advice is to be prepared.  Make your little meals and take them along wherever you go - therefore no excuses.  Us overweight people are great at coming up with excuses - but when you are serious about it, there is no place to hide and you got to take responsibilty for every decision, every morsal that goes into your mouth.  That is where I am at. 

So day 8 and 100%

Friday and the weekend is upon me.

Weekends are always difficult for dieters.  Parties / Going out is planned for this time and you have to be "good on your diet".  It can lead to bitterness toward those that can eat whatever they feel.  I am going to see it as an opportunity to stay in control.

I've got half day today and need to go shop for more groceries and vitamins.  It is also my uncle Brians' birthday and he has requested a mild curry.  I shall be cooking this mild curry and I know it's going to be a huge test.  I LOVE curry.  I am up for it though.When a thought comes along that tempts me, I think "how long does my uncle have?" So I shake that thought away and say no. Tonight I shall prepare my diet meal in a curry fashion too - my dinner is going to be curried 100g mince with green beans.  100g green beans will really "beef" up the meal and it will look like a lot - yes I'm tricking my brain.  Don't forget my 2 provitas and.....say it with me.... my mango!!!!  Yes I'm getting salivatingly excited about mango.

As for the rest of the weekend, I know it's going to be tough, but I will be armed with my bottle of water, my strong will and desire to succeed.  When I blog again it will be day 8!  One whole week would have gone by of me being 100% excellent on my diet.  If I can do it for 1 week, I can do it for another.

Do I feel thinner?

That is the question my mother asked me today.  I sure as hell feel empty, I'm convinced that if you tap my tummy you'll hear an echo. That being said I'm not as hungry as I thought I'd be - this is a big bonus, but who knows, I haven't been tested yet.  So back to the question:  Do I feel thinner today?  Nope, not really.  It is only day 4 and perhaps it's a bit soon to expect great results, but you know us fatties, when we start a diet, we expect to be thin overnight.  I've learnt my lesson, that is why I'm not going to be weighing every week.  I know my weight (will be revealed at a later time for fear of shocking you poor souls).  I know what clothes fit me well and which are too tight, so I'll be judging by that. And besides that, it's that specific t i m e  o f   t h e   m o n t h.  Don't need to say much more on that except "bloat".

I feel good, healthy and mostly positive, I think the little bit of 'brain rot' is due to work and not the diet.

I had very odd dreams last night - all to do with people changing into werewolves and coming after me.  I had to go on a quest and find Lion Eyes and replace the eyes of the werewolf pack leader - odd to say the very least.

Tomorrow is my uncle Brian's birthday.  The uncle that has inspired me to go forth and conquer this bane of mine.  Now this may be a bit hard to handle especially since my family celebrate with food, cakes, sweets and cooldrinks.  I'll have to make my food and take it with me, with a Sprite Zero and my faithful mango.  I WILL NOT CHEAT.  I have absolutely no desire too.

Oh yes, that is another thing I've noticed these past 4 days - I'm satisfied once I eat, and I am absolutely enjoying savouring every little morsal.  **insert chuckle here** The amount of food isn't all that huge as I've explained, I dropped a little piece of tussers cheese on the kitchen floor at work, looked around, eyed it and honestly contemplated picking it up and poping it into my mouth - food is precious right now you know.  What a bloody waste!  Picked the cheese up and trashed it, I'm not that desperate.....yet :)
 

 

Last night and Day 3

Well well well.  I must say that by the time I left work for home last night, I was anything but in a good mood. And let me explain why.  I work in the advertising industry for a group of magazines.  I focus on Country Life property and accommodation advertising and  I do love my job.  I've been in advertising for most of my career life. Yesturday I was told to take a certain aspect of my job seriously!!!!!!!!!!!!  Now you can imagine: I'm pms-sing, I'm hungry, I work very well and you tell me to take my job seriously! SERIOUSLY? 

Straight away I'm frustrated and pretty much wanting to blow up and shower blubber over these people.  But I keep my cool.  Cooooool as a cucumber.  Still frustrated though and that is one of biggest triggers.  I want to rush to the nearest take out, spar or fridge and eat.  Now I knew I could do that this time around.  From Monday I'm controlling this aspect of my life.  Anyway, so on the drive home I'm debating if I should pull off and cheat - I mean who would know right.  SIS LOU!  I assure you I didn't.  Hooray!  I did open the fridge though and pulled out my left over mango.  It was refreshingly cold.  I sat down and slowly savoured my mango, enjoying every little bit.

A while later I cooked my dinner and it was pretty delish - I am fortunate in that I have a knack of making food taste good, even if it's diet food.  I had a bit of reading to do that needed feedback and that kept my mind busy and not focused on the emptiness.

I was up by 6 am, had a bath, took my second photo and procceeded to get breakfast made - yoghurt and mango.  I keep it pretty easy and simple during the week and I must say the mango does make a huge difference.  Got lunch ready (half a gem, 2 tsp onions, 50g mushies  and 60g tussers cheese) and headed off to work.  Again being busy has distracted me from the emptiness in my tummy.  The day has gone pretty smoothly and I'm checking out some truly inspirational pics on a support forum for Dr Cohen dieters - WOW.  http://drcohensupport.co.za/photos/   These pics are truly inspiring and I will put my pics up on that site one day.

What I haven't done yet is put up my "why are you doing this" I sent an email to friends and family telling them I'm going to be blogging - hell they may be the only ones reading it for all I know, but that is okay.  They are the most important and they get to know what's truly going on inside.... 

here is my why:  I had a chat with uncle Brian last night (he is the reason I'm taking this so seriously and though bitter sweet, is my inspiration for this)  For those that don't know my Uncle Brian is terminally ill with a variety of cancers.  Uncle Brian said to me that he always believed he would see me slim.  I know that there is a limit on my time to do this now and I want him to see me slim and healthy. Of course I want this for myself too, but faced with my uncles' mortality has inspired me to go for it and accomplish this one thing that has held me back for so long from living my best life.  I don't want to have regrets when my time comes to leave this world.  No matter what, uncle Brian has always believed in every single one of his nieces and nephews and only wants the very best for us.  He tells us we are champions in our own right and can accomplish anything we want.  I ask that you all help in your own way - don't offer me cakes, food, drinks for the time being and if you see me doing / eating something I shouldn't, tell me and be firm about it.  The only time I will be giving a little bit of lee-way is in August (a dinner show) and then back on track.

Watch this space......

Too soon for an update?

Oh my word!!! My stomach is gnawing on my spine and I have a headache! It's sitting on the right side of my head, banging away.  Lunch was quite tastey and yes very little compared to what I would have.  So I'm already keen for dinner but that is 2 hours away.  Don't have any diet cooldrink on hand, so I guess it's to the water trough.  I also shan't suffer this detoxing headache, I'm off to get 2 headache powders - I'm no martyre.

A Brand New Start.

Today is the 23rd of March.  I officially started my journey to a thinner/slimmer/healthier self yesturday, complete with front and side pics.  I can tell you it's a scary picture. I am an obese female and of course with that comes a hellofa lot of baggage...and I'm not only speaking about the weight issue. People look at you differently, treat you differently.  I'm so sick of it.  Even movies potray obese people in a very negative light - as mindless, stupid eating machines.  That is not entirely true.  Some people may eat for the sake of eating, others eat to fill a void, other more so because that is how their family brought them up - it can be come rather complex.

For me, I eat for a number of reasons: stress, when I'm unhappy, when I'm happy (celebrate with food) or to cover over the hurt/disappointment I've faced in my life.

So what is different now than all the previous attempts to loose weight.  My uncle!  He is terminally ill with cancer and is facing his mortality.  He says he has lived a good life for the most part.  That got me to thinking "would I have regrets if my time came now?"  Whole-heartedly yes!  Now I don't want that for my life.  I don't want to have regrets.  I want to life a very full life, finding new experiences, to explore other avenues, and honestly being overweight prevents me from truly painting my life canvas.

So I've chosen the eating plan I'll be following:  Dr Cohen.  It's not the easiest to follow, but it's healthy and provides me with what I need.  Sure sure people may say "cut down", "smaller portions" - for some that may work, it doesn't with me.  When food tastes more-ish, I go for more. To give you a clue as to what I'm eating this is my food for today:  Woke up at around 6:50 am.  7:30 am I had 175ml of plain yoghurt with half a large mango.  I've had 2 cups of rooibos with 2 sweetners, 1 provita and 1 cup of water, soon to be followed by a second.  My lunch will be at 12:30 (5 hours between meals) and yes I'm already feeling the hunger pains.  I'm having 60g tussers cheese, 100g red pepper and 2 provitas.  Know that I'll more than likely have a couple of glasses of water before, to fill me up.  Dinner at around about 17:30 will be 110g marrows, with 110g chicken (I'll add a bit of garlic, salt and pepper - no spice!! no oil!!!) 2 provitas.  The other half of the mango.


Yes not the easiest of eating plans to follow, but I will.  Oh yes I'm also allowed to have 1lt of Tab, Diet fanta or sprite zero. I count those as my treats and don't have them every day.

How do I feel....hungry, optimistic and youthful (Justin Biebiers' Baby Baby Baby oooooh is playing on the radio) I want to succeed!  

I have also started a photo diary, these pics will be uploaded after a certain period of time.  They are taken every second day at about the same time in the morning, wearing the same clothes. 

And that is it for now.