After my last 2 months I do need to have a bit of a detox - now I know I was meant to start this a week ago, that didn't happen, and no I didn't beat myself up over it. I don't have enough in the emotional reserves to do that. All I can do is forgive myself and pick it up and move on.
Right as I first stated when I started this journey, it takes 21 days to break or make a habit. I'm going back to that. It gives me a definate goal to work towards and something that is achievable - I've done it before remember. So 21 days / take 2 / let's go.
I won't be detoxing for the full 21 days - I'll only detox for a week to kick start and then go back to my eating plan. I know it's going to have it own trials and difficulties but know that I did it very succesfully a little while back gives me hope.
It's all about my personal decisions I make with regards to food. Do I say no or do I go ahead and just cheat because that is what I want. I know that. I can accept that responsibility. Even though there were factors involved in my little crumble I was still very aware of my decisions.
Something else that has changed and is quite a big thing for me is that I'm moving in with my gran. Sure at 35 you may think "why the hell would you do that". A couple of reasons. 1) I really want to be financially free, I want to be able to have the security of a decent nest egg that if I choose to leave employment I can do that, or when the times comes for that operation I can pay for it cash instead of taking a loan at ridiculous interest rates. In order to be able to financially free it is wise not to have any debts, the quickets and easiest way right now to free up 'big' money is to move in with my gran. 2) My gran is very lonely since my uncle has died. I only get to see her on the weekends, so this will help her out and I know even at her age, she likes to feel that she can still help out. ** Sometimes risk and sacrifice is needed to realise your dreams ** I am willing to do that. Another exciting chapter in my life. An opportunity for me to grow and may this parthway lead to a fulfillment of a dream.
Talking about finances, I am so sick and tired of this countries politions raping it's people. That is how I see the corrupt politions that use tax payers money to fund their lavish lifestyles and blatantly show off their ill gained weath. They do not / are not and will not make inroads in providing the people of South Africa with the services and lifestyle they require. These politions have deviated from their path and have grown "obese and lazy" in fulfilling their ministerial duties. They need to go on a serious diet - literally and figuratively. If I had a choice, I would not pay my taxes. I don't want the money I work for to line their pockets. Billions and billions of rands are mis apropriated and the governemnt seek new ways to skin us.
That is my political rant. I have noticed in the past year how my views have become a little radical - on health, politics, religion - radical perhaps is not the correct choice - passionate about what I stand for and believe in - yes that better describes it.
On the health side of things for eg: if you have diabeties - live the healthy lifestyle that will benefit you, you can't, like me, just eat what you want without consequinces. If you refuse to change your lifestyle you cannot complain when complications arise from your illness. It would be hypocritical. I can't complain about putting on weight when I haven't watched what I've eaten. You got to take responsibility for your own actions or even lack of action.
This next month I'm going to be cutting out the fat / what I don't need to move with me. It's a step I want to take because I want something better for myself later on.
Don't be afraid of risk. Don't be afraid to even take a step back if you get a better view of where you want to go and how to make it happen.
Health is wealth.
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